Now what? How can I possibly add depth to a well-rooted relationship? Why write when we already talk? What is there to share? I guess we'll find out :)


Last night I went to bed with a bit of guilt and bunch of sadness. The guilt had to do with a two minute phone call from mom. The ring pleasantly broke the silence in my little apartment, but I had no desire to tell her how my day was spent. When asked if there was anything new or interesting, I simply replied "no" in a tone that did not invite conversation. I wanted to avoid the most certain chastising that would have ensued from telling her what I told everyone else on Facebook: that I willingly woke up at a ridiculous 4AM to go golfing in the wind and rain because I wanted to get acclimated for the Bandon trip. Yes, I'm still getting over the cold. No, I wasn't dressed warmly enough. No, I didn't bring an umbrella. I know, I know, I know. I felt guilty for snubbing her of my life experiences. -- Mom, we got to tee off with a glow ball because it was still so dark! My friend and I impressed all the men because we chose to carry our bags in what most would consider unplayable conditions! I managed one birdie and a few tough pars! -- None of that would make it through to her. She gently ended the call to attend to more episodes of Planet Earth. Sorry mom :(


Right before I laid down, I saw more images online of devastation from Japan. As I pulled a blanket of sadness over my worn body, my heart sank over what was lost. We really have no idea, do we? None of us. We can imagine it, but we can't truly relate with the suffering. We can't even smell it. Meanwhile, the images of anti-nuclear protesters struck me as disturbing. In a time of such crisis, I don't understand how some people would choose to exert their views and energy to make a political statement. It is not the right time to fuel dissension. The people who've lost their entire livelihoods and loved ones do not care about the voices for or against nuclear power. Despite all the sorrow, loses, fear, and uncertainty, I prayed for God's mercy and presence. I prayed for unity across nations. I prayed for a stark awareness of humanity over the insignificant "buzz" we tend to draw towards. Let us be virally connected via the human spirit.